Give me control of Derpibooru

Site and Policy » Give me control of Derpibooru Search Posts
Background Pony #AD19
Dear all Derpibooru staff and users,  
I am just a humble Background Pony, but ponies in the background can do beautiful things. Take Applejack for example. She’s one of the Elements!  
Here’s my request: give me full control of the website Derpibooru.  
Why should you do this? Because I’m telling you to. I want to have complete control over Derpibooru, and I want you to give it to me.  
I have a lot of experience; I have travelled to many third-world countries and experienced firsthand how effective despotism can be. I want to be your despot.  
Please, I implore you to give me access to all of Derpibooru’s administrative functions. I certainly must be better than the previous administration.  
If you wish to accept my offer, then please send all relevant information to iwantderpibooru@horsefucker.org.  
Thank you,  
from a concerned Background Pony.
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