deactivated4e9df8082 Goo[d morning, freedom-lovers.
Princess Luna here, the fourth branch of government, the Lunar Republic.
You know, there are three things we'll never get rid of in Equestria:
One, the parasprites in the public library.
Two, Granny Smith's compost heap.
And three, our six thousand-term princess the illiterate, tax-cheating, student-humping, spend-o-crat Princess Celestia.
(**Celestia**: Hey, I am no longer illiterate)
Now, why are we doomed to this Celestia quagmire, you ask oh reasonable listener? Because this town is under the stranglehold of a few wall-eyed "blank flanks" who'd rather play Bump Bump Sugar Lump Rump than invade the Chrystal Empire.]