The Story of Cassie

It was a few years before Equestria got its magic back. I had just come back from the pub, wasted as hell. I was so drunk that once I made it to my front door, I pissed all over it thinking it was a toilet. I entered my apartment, made a beeline towards my bed, threw up a couple times, and finally passed out.

When I woke up the next morning, I had a headache. I was hung over. I headed towards the bathroom mirror and stared at my own reflection: bags under my bloodshot eyes. Vomit on my chin. A five-o’-clock shadow. I didn’t even take my morning pill that morning, I just trudged back to my room. But when I got there, I saw the most unexpected thing I had ever seen before, laying on the very bed I slept on.

It was pink. I thought I was so drunk that I stole a pink blanket without knowing what I was doing. So I walked up to it. But then I stopped in my tracks when I got a closer look. It was the size of a pony. That’s because it was a pony. Furthermore, it was an earth pony. And it was a mare.

I heard so much about the earth ponies. Based on what I heard from the boys at the pub, earth ponies were bloodthirsty savages who spared not a single soul. I stood there lost in that thought, not realizing she was waking up. And when I came to my senses, it was too late. She was wide awake and looking at me dead in the eye.

This time, I was terrified. I didn’t know what to do. Should I scream? Should I report this to the authorities? Would she try to stop me? I was pondering my next move when I saw the look on her face: she was just as frightened of me as I was of her. I slowly walked towards her, but she tried to back away. She had tears in her eyes when we were both standing two feet away from each other. I finally picked up the courage to say something.

“H-hello.”

She sat on my bed frozen. She must’ve been more afraid of me than I was of her. I tried talking to her again:

“It’s nice to meet you.”

Again, no answer.

“My name is Alfred Venturer. What’s yours?”

“Cassie,” she finally responded.

“Cassie? That’s a beautiful name,” I replied. “And you have a beautiful voice.”

Her pupils dilated. She must’ve started to realize I wasn’t as bad as she thought I was. But I could the she was still unsure of me.

“So, what brings you here?”

Then she started to sob. “I-I’m sorry!” I said. “I didn’t mean to scare you! I was just trying to get to know you!”

“It’s not that,” she said. “I just don’t feel like talking about it right now.”

“Oh,” I said. “Mind if I hug you?” She shook her head no.

We sat on the bed hugging each other for thirty minutes. When she finally stopped crying, I asked if she felt better. She nodded. Then my stomach started to growl. It was already 10:30 in the morning. I was hungry. “Whoa! I’m hungry! Want me to make you something to eat?”

“Yes, that would be nice.”

And that was the beginning of something special.

Day by day, we began to trust each other in our secret relationship. I rarely ever went back to the pub. In fact, it had gotten to the point where every time I’d pass by the pub, I’d flip both of my middle feathers at the place. Cassie mostly stayed in my apartment, but when she did go out, she’d wear a pair of fake wings that I had crafted myself using my superior art skills. (They honestly didn’t look that good, but she told me that I should take pride in my work. Besides, they seemed to have worked surprisingly well.)

Soon, she finally told me why she came to Zephyr Heights in the first place: Apparently, she had been the victim of an abusive husband. Every time she made one little mistake, he’d slap her in the face. But the way she saw it, it was like he’d do it every time she moved a muscle. It had gotten to the point where he’d slap her multiple times. Then one day, she actually peed herself just because she accidentally broke a plate doing the dishes. She ended up receiving twice as many slaps as she’d gotten before. At that moment, she had decided that enough was enough. She shoved him out of the way and ran out the door crying.

She didn’t feel like Maretime Bay was safe anymore. She wanted to get as far away from her husband as possible. So she set out on a journey for some other civilization. She didn’t know where, she just wanted to get away from Maretime Bay as soon as possible. She told me that the journey was horrible: she had to live through harsh weather, hot temperatures, and pesky bugs. But when she arrived at Zephyr Heights, it was nighttime. It took her five hours to scale the mountain. But when she reached the civilization, she tried to find the closest, safest place she could find, which just so happened to be my apartment.

I told her not to worry. As long as we were together, she was safe. She smiled and hugged me. I hugged her back.

Just then, I felt something. It was flowing through my veins. I felt powerful. Suddenly, I had the urge to flap my wings, so I did. I flapped progressively faster and faster until I felt myself being lifted off the ground. I was… flying?! Cassie looked up at me in shock. Then she rushed over to the TV and turned it over to the news. I wasn’t the only one flying; the other pegasi were flying as well! Magic seemed to have come back. “CASSIE, PINCH ME!!!” I shouted. She did. It was real. Magic had actually returned. We both cheered in pure excitement. Then I picked Cassie off the ground and took her out flying in celebration.

We flew for several minutes. We flew past the Jumbotron, around the palace, and three laps around the perimeter of the city.

Then I got a little carried away and flew to Maretime Bay to thank the five heroes who brought back magic.

When we finally found them at the then-destroyed lighthouse, I told them everything that happened. I told them about us flying (Cassie was still disguising herself as a pegasus) and how we got to reach heights we’ve never reached before. They congratulated us and welcomed us to Maretime Bay. But then, suddenly, we heard a loud, rough masculine voice shout, “HEY!!!” We all turned to see a reddish-brown stallion with a faded blond mane and a wrench for a cutie mark step towards us with a five-o’-clock shadow and a golden tooth. He came up to me and shouted, “What are you doing with my wife?!”

“Who?” I asked without thinking.

He bitch-slapped me and said, “Don’t you play stupid with me. You know damn well that’s my wife behind your…” He noticed her fake wings and growled, “What did you do to my wife?”

“Nothing,” I replied.

“BULLSHIT!!!” He shouted. Then he grabbed ahold of my throat and stared to strangle me. Then the yellow stallion, Hitch, tackled him and started punching him. “What the heck is wrong with you?!” He shouted.

“HE FUCKED MY WIFE, THAT’S WHAT!” he screamed.

“HEY!” I shouted. I was about to defend myself when Cassie stepped in.

“He didn’t do a thing to me, Buckley,” she said. “He fed me and took care of me. Unlike you did.”

“Nonsense. I took care of you, too. I put meals on your plate–”

“You beat me and slapped me every time I made a single mistake!” She said with tears in her eyes. “You call that caring?!”

Hitch asked Buckley, “Sir, is this true?”

There was an awful long silence. Then he finally let out a long, heavy sigh and answered, “Yea. I slapped her. But I was only kidding.”

“Well, your so-called wife didn’t see it that way,” Hitch said. He then slapped a pair of hoof-cuffs on him and said, “You’re under arrest for domestic abuse.”

Then the short one, Pipp, pointed out, “Wait. Cassie’s a pegasus. How could she have been in a relationship with an earth pony?” Cassie then remembered she still had her wings on. She then took them off and said, “I was never a pegasus in the first place.” She then officially broke up with Buckley as Hitch carried him to the station.

Later that night, Cassie and I were walking down the streets of Maretime Bay. We talked about how her whole life had changed since the day we met. I told her that I still can’t believe I could fly. She chuckled. We were passing under a street lamp when she stopped in her tracks. She then went on to tell me that I had changed her life forever. That she now had a reason to live. It was a miracle. I told her that my life had changed, too; thanks to her, I quit drinking. We both smiled at each other. Then, we both leaned forward and kissed each other. It was our first kiss ever.

Needless to say, ever since that very moment, the street lamp we kissed beneath still shines twenty-four hours a day.

It turns out, the boys at the pub were way off about the rumors. Not only were they wrong about earth ponies, they got the rumors themselves mixed up. The common rumors about earth ponies was that they were incredibly stupid, while us pegasi were the savage ones.

Life in Maretime Bay was great. I decided to move in, Cassie and I bought a house nearby, and we both got jobs. Because she had a thing for foals, she decided to become a preschool teacher. I was feeling rather smart, so I decided to hit the books and start studying. In addition, I developed a passion for curiosity and mystery, so I visited the library and checked out a bunch of crime novels. I also purchased a few puzzle books and a Rubik’s Cube to test my wits. I even went as far as to start playing–and get hooked on–the Professor Layton series. I was later inspired by the games to become a puzzle maker myself.

When summer rolled around, we hired a gardener named Bushy Twee. While he would work, we’d talk about stuff like memes, YouTube, politics, etc. He would later become my best friend, paying me visits just because he could. We’d joke around and watch SMG4 every Saturday and Wednesday. We’d play video games (mostly ROBLOX), we’d share memes we made/found online, and we’d do little roleplays. It was nice having him around.

I began to feel like I could contribute to our relationship. I told Cassie that I would like to be a college professor in critical thinking. She told me it doesn’t really work like that. I can’t just magically become a college professor; I hadn’t even gone to college. She also told me that there are no critical thinking classes in college. “I mean, sure, some classes do teach critical thinking,” she said, “but there aren’t any classes that teach critical thinking as a subject.” But I just passed it off, saying, “Then I’ll just get a job there and teach it myself.”
She then responded with, “That’s gonna require a few degrees, you know, including a master’s degree. And how do you plan on doing that?”

“You’ll see,” I answered. And the next day, I signed up for college and, eventually, got enrolled.

Six years into college, Cassie had a huge surprise waiting for me. When I came home one day, I found Cassie covered up, curled up on our bed. But she wasn’t asleep. And she was looking at me with a tired smile. When I asked her what was going on, she told me to lean forward. And what she whispered in my ear really tickled me pink:

I was ecstatic. It was music to my ears. We were having a baby! I ran out the door cheering. Everyone congratulated me when I ran past them. It was a miracle.

The baby came eight months later. She remains to be one of my greatest treasures of all time. Her name is Winter Heart.

After I had officially earned the title of Professor Venturer, I decided it was time to take our relationship one step further. I purchased a beautiful crystal ring from Bridlewood. Then I arranged a date with Cassie for that night. She accepted and hired Bushy to take care of our then 2-year-old baby. After that, we were off on our date.

We went bowling, tried out an escape room, played laser tag, and won a contest, among other things. We had a blast. We eventually arrived at a park in Zephyr Heights. We laughed and joked around while we walked together. We decided to stop at a gazebo and take a few selfies, and post our photos on Facehoof. But then, my phone died just when I was gonna post my favorite photo. I felt a little down. “Aw, don’t feel bad, Ventie! You still got me!” she said.

I looked up at her and said, “You’re right. I shouldn’t.” Then, I dropped to one knee, took out the ring, and asked her if she could be my bride.

With tears in her eyes, she accepted. It was wonderful.

The next day, we went to the Crystal Brighthouse and told the Mane Five the news. We told them that because magic had returned eight years ago and the three races were reunited, the two of us were happier than ever. We then told them that we were now engaged. They all got excited, especially Izzy. Because almost immediately, she decided it was time to throw a party. I was delighted to know we were going to get a party, but was a little concerned that we were throwing a party this early. I was about to say something when it was already too late; the first guest had already arrived. And then another. And then another. Soon enough, there were guests left and right, including Bushy and even Buckley! What else could I do but have fun?

We played games. We told stories. We danced. We sang. There was cheering, laughter, and joy all around us. I felt like a soldier who had just returned from war. And when it was all over, Pipp shared a toast: “These two may not be entirely special, but they’ve actually done a lot for our society, teaching us all very interesting things. Thanks to Cassie, our foals will grow up to have fresh and intelligent minds, and thanks to Alfred, our community will use what they learned to solve even the toughest problems. So, here’s to a successful future for both of them! Cheers!”

“Cheers!” We all shouted. It was the best day of my entire life.

But even so, all good things must come to an end, as the very next day would be forever etched in history as the first day of the Livestream Incident.

You probably know the story. But for those of you who don’t know, Pipp essentially went insane and killed Izzy for revealing Pipp’s deepest insecurities during a livestream. Anyway, the first stream started out pretty normal, as you would expect. Pipp talked about the party Izzy threw for Cassie and I the day before, and how we all had a good time. And then Izzy came in and started talking, and soon the antics ensued. When I watched the first livestream and saw what Izzy did, I didn’t think much about it. I just thought it’d be over the next day. That everypony would forget about it the next day. But I was wrong.

The next day, Pipp streamed again, and I tuned in. It started off with Pipp apologizing about what happened in her previous livestream before she went on to talk about what’s been going on. It went pretty well, but then I noticed at the live chat before Pipp did. I will admit that some of the Pipp jokes were actually pretty funny, and I laughed a lot harder than I should’ve at one particular joke. But the humor stopped when I saw the look on Pipp’s face: utter horror. Before we knew it, the livestream ended. To this day, I feel ashamed of laughing at Pipp that day.

Time went on, and there was no sign of Pipp anywhere. Not on ClipTrot, not in Maritime Bay, nowhere. Cassie and I started to get worried. We wondered if she had gone missing, or worse, killed herself. We asked everyone in town if they knew where she went. We asked different pegasi in Zephyr Heights if they knew. But we never got an answer. We went to the Brighthouse to tell the Mane Five–or should I say Four–about the results of our search. We were going to declare the mystery unsolved when my phone blew up with notifications. Everypony found Pipp.

She was wearing a white cloak and a pair of sunglasses to disguise herself, right in front of the Canter Logic building. Apparently, someone accidentally stepped on the hem of her cloak, revealing the mysterious mare herself. I could see tears swelling in her eyes. Next thing we knew, she flew off again. The videos I saw may have shocked me, but the very next livestream really caught us all off guard that night.

That night, the entire town was talking about what we had all witnessed when we all got the same notification: a new livestream. We all clicked on it and were stricken with horror. We all saw Izzy lying on the floor next a baseball bat wrapped halfway with barbed wire. We then saw a furious Pipp Petals yelling at us for making fun of her that day. I can’t really say exactly what she said because I can’t remember it all, so I’ll give you the gist: she said we were all horrible ponies for not caring at all about her insecurities. She called us twats because we knew she didn’t want to be called out for her height or weight and made fun of her anyway (I didn’t know anything about it until Izzy pointed it out in the first livestream, so how was I supposed to know?) She finally shouted that we all deserve to burn in hell. Just then, Sunny interrupted the stream and freaked out when she saw Izzy’s corpse lying in the middle of the floor. The last thing we heard was Pipp’s malicious giggle before the stream ended.

We were all terrified. Some of the foals started crying hysterically, while other ponies spazzed out. We all knew what this meant. Pipp was now criminally insane, and we all had to protect ourselves and our loved ones from her bloody grasp. It was wild.

A week after the Incident, Cassie and I got married. Not very many ponies attended, since they were all afraid of Pipp. Only a few ponies came, including Bushy and a few of the boys from the pub in Zephyr Heights, as well as a few parents whose foals attended Cassie’s preschool. Not even my own family came. But the wedding had to go on. In fact, we did manage to have a little fun. We danced a little and played a few games. It was okay. And soon, the ceremony was over. We went back home. Cassie and I were about to go to bed when I realized I left something important to me at the site of the wedding, so I decided to go fetch it before it was too late. But this is where things went from bad to worse.

I was walking down the streets of Maretime Bay to try to remember where we held the wedding. Suddenly, I heard a whooshing noise behind. I turned but saw nothing. I figured I was in trouble, but for some reason, I stood there trying to remember where we held the wedding. Then, a tin can fell over behind me. This time I felt my body quaking; I was terrified. I looked all around me to see if anypony was there, but I couldn’t find anyone. Suddenly, I remembered the location of the wedding: right outside Posey’s house. But before I could do anything, something grabbed me by the muzzle from behind and covered my face with a rag. I blacked out not long afterwards. I had been chloroformed.

When I woke up, I looked up to see Pipp giving me a slasher smile. My heart sank. Could this really be the end of me? I asked her why she had me.

“You were alone at night,” she answered.

“What do you want to do to me?”

“Torture you, of course!”

I started to bawl. I pleaded mercy , as I had just gotten married that day. I didn’t want to lose everything I hold close to me.

“Aw, tough luck.” She raised her bat.

“No, please! I’ll do anything for you!” I shouted.

She froze. “Anything?”

“Anything.”

She lowered her bat and put her hoof on her chin. “Well…” she pondered. “I do suppose you cloud help me out on a few… chores…” She then explained that she didn’t think that she was scary enough, so she considered starting an ask blog. Problem was, she took her email for granted for so long that she forgot the password. So she forced me to start a blog using my email. It was a matter of life and death, so I had no other choice but to do what she asked. And that’s the story behind the Ask Pippamena blog.

So, I might’ve escaped, and society might be on the verge of collapse without a ruler to guide us, but is my life bad? No, it isn’t. I have everything I need here. I don’t need anything! All I need is my beautiful, lovely Cassie.