@Background Pony #547D  
Shh…. that’s too much for your eyes, child…

@Kraggera  
Okay dude, seriously, WHAT does your internet browsing history look like?

This Breezie is aboot to live my dreams… If only I had slept today.

Abacus Cinch:  
“Listen up everypony! We’ve come together this very night, under the glow of this  
Equestrian inferno, for one serious reason… [drapes herself in an extravagant  
cape] ….FK THE PRINCESSES**!!”
 
[Everypony cheered]
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Those oversize feather dusters have RUINED us! With Princess Celestia prattling  
ON and ON about the weak and poor…WE are the superior species, not a FKING  
soup kitchen!”
 
Italian Pony:  
“THANK you! Even WE’RE sick of feeding other ponies!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“And what did Princess Luna do to her glorious old throne…? Why, she replaced it  
with a WOODEN CHAIR! Which is probably carved by pathetic commoners…”
 
Spanish Pony:  
“Ponies were kings FIRST and carpenters SECOND!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“And do not get me start with Princess Cadence legalizing gay and interspecies  
marriages…Oh, if you LOVE them so much, why don’t you fking MARRY them?!  
You seem SO okay with the concept!!”
 
Canadian Pony:  
“Yeah, bro! This here is Adam and Eve! Not Adam and some gay dragon dude and  
they’re havin’ sex!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“WE ponies are the superior species, together we will purge Equestria of it’s prostitution,  
homosexuality, and poverty!!”
 
Jewish Hippogriff:  
“Indeed! Perhaps we shall agree that MAYBE Princesses AREN’T supposed to rule all  
of Equestria~!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“I shall lead you all for tonight’s Crusade, for I am your leader, the leader of the  
HIGHEST rank of royalty…QUEEN Abacus Cinch!!! And after we are done purging ALL of  
Equestria of it’s demons and heathens, WE - WILL-!!”
 
Southern Pony:  
“ROUND UP ALL THOSE DIRTY BUFF-!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Okay, YOU need to chill!!”
 
Blackout

Southern Pony:  
“Hey, don’t worry…By the way, I noticed y’all brought some alicorn statues that  
need a good ol’ burnin’. If ya run out, don’t worry, we brought some more back in  
the truck!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Uh, thank you, but no. That won’t be necessary–”
 
Southern Pony:  
(Calls out loud)  
“HEY! How many more statues we got in that truck!?”
 
“ABOUT A FEW!”
 
Southern Pony:  
“About a few…”
 
Abacus Cinch:  

Italian Pony:  
“Good evening, signora~! We are the Pure Noble Manehattan Division, and we bring  
510 paladins of the order!”
 
Spanish Pony:  
“Buenas noches, senorita! We are…Equine Inquisition!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Oh…I, uh, wasn’t quite expecting you….”
 
Spanish Pony:  
“No one ever does! We bring 888 conquistador inquisitors!”
 
Jewish Hippogriff:  
“Shalom, good lady! We are the sacred order of the Holy Hippogriff!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Oh, I’ve… never heard of this order. Are you…sure you’re part pony…?”
 
Jewish Hippogriff:  
“Oh, of course my dear%! We bring 447 hippogriff brothers and sisters”
 
Canadian Pony:  
“Hey there lady%! We’re the Stallion Salvation Army from good ol’ Las Pegasus.  
F**K, bro! Let’s kill some g*y dragons!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Changelings….”
 
Canadian Pony:  
“Yeah, sorry, whatever. We bring 509 holy hosers, eh%”
 
Southern Pony:  
“Now I gotta say; I ain’t to comfortable killin’ changelings. In fact, some of my  
best buddies are neo changelings! But then again, these are those classic-type  
changelings, so–”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Excuse me….And YOU are….?”
 
Southern Pony:  
“Howdy there ma’am%! We’re the South Appleloosa Confederate Congregation! And I got  
me some 300 n’ change good ol’ colts from the Knights of the Dead Buffalo!”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
(Awkwardly uncomfortable)  
“Ah, yes. Well, thank you for… swinging by. …Oh, dear…”

(Indigo Zap finds Chancellor Abacus Cinch  
napping on a yard chair)
 
Indigo Zap:  
“Uh, Lady Cinch? Are you awake…?”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
(Wakes up)  
“Ugh….Oh lord…I must have overslept….You think watching all of Equestria  
turn into a burning wasteland would keep you entertained, but when the  
screaming stops… it would seem rather boring….So, what did I missed?”
 
Indigo Zap:  
“Well, there’s been reports the Carealot is under attack”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“So, the changelings are attacking them as well?”
 
Indigo Zap:  
“Actually, no….”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“…Okay…? What about the Crystal Knights?”
 
Indigo Zap:  
“Uh, we failed to recruit them for our cause”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“What!?”
 
Indigo Zap:  
“Oh, b-but don’t worry m’lady! We WERE able to find some, uh….  
eager volunteers….”
 
Abacus Cinch:  
“Volunteers…?”

Changeling Captain:  
“Lieutenant Mane-iac, we’re just outside Princess Twilight’s castle.  
we’ll maintain this position as we observe-”
 
Mane-iac:  
“NO! All hooves to battle stations.”
 
Changeling Captain:  
“Huh?? B-but Ma’am… Our orders”
 
Mane-iac:  
“I’ve been waiting for this chance for revenge on the Mane 6 for years. I’ve been given weapons, soldier,  
AND a target. I will NOT be denied of this opportunity by that overgrown cockroach! I–… no, WE will  
get what’s coming to us… Now Captain, launch the missiles!!”
 
Changeling Captain:  
“….Yes ma’am!”

LoL Top KeK :D
 
Thank you, I needed this laugh today :D :D

Fanart only shows that happening with Fluttershy. Someone has some work to do.

Well, looks like it’s time to stop browsing the booru for today.

Reverse psychology, eh?

Haha, nice reference

God I even read it in that breezie voice, too.

Your mind tricks won’t work on me breezie >:(

Yeah stick her in your giant ponut instead.

“Okay… What does your internet history look like?”

Love the reference