Gosh it disturbs me to see you Big Mac, looking so down in the dumps,
Everyone here wants to be you Big Mac, even when taking your lumps,
There’s no man in town as admired as you, your everyone’s favorite guy,
Everyone awed and inspired by you, and it’s not very hard to describe.
No-one’s slick like Big Mac,
No-one’s quick like Big Mac,
No-one’s neck’s is incredibly thick like Big Mac,
Cause there’s no one in town half as Manly,
Perfect, A pure paragon,
You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley,
And the’ll tell you who’s team they’d prefer to be on.
Everyone here wants to be you Big Mac, even when taking your lumps,
There’s no man in town as admired as you, your everyone’s favorite guy,
Everyone awed and inspired by you, and it’s not very hard to describe.
No-one’s slick like Big Mac,
No-one’s quick like Big Mac,
No-one’s neck’s is incredibly thick like Big Mac,
Cause there’s no one in town half as Manly,
Perfect, A pure paragon,
You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley,
And the’ll tell you who’s team they’d prefer to be on.
And shouldn’t Gaston be the pony who’s followed around by three adoring fangirls?