Entry in a warped and water-damaged diary:
 
Half the page is covered in incomplete and scratched out sentences
 
I’ve been staring at this page for half an hour, but I can’t figure out how to put into words what happened. I don’t know what Lord Virtuoso thinks happened to me, since I’m a full 5 weeks late on my last report now. He was getting impatient before, I can only imagine what he’s doing right now. But my head is still kind of fuzzy and so damn horny I’m still pretty disoriented.  
I guess the best place to start would be at the beginning.
 
After my initial findings in Ponyville, leads started to dry up. I guess word had gotten around that I was asking questions about any local Tentacula, and maybe they were afraid I was up to no good, because no new information came in for a long time. Broaching the subject was tough enough, but now I was at a loss. For the longest time the only source of information I had was that strange book I’d found buried in the back of the archives in City Hall. But reading that for too long starts to make my head spin and my imagination to get away from me. If even half of what I read was true, I’d really start to question our place in the universe, and bringing something like that to Lord Virtuoso and the other researchers would get me laughed out of the room at best.  
But Lord Virtuoso was starting to lose patience with me. He was threatening to send one of his top researchers - probably Keen Star, that teacher’s pet. If that had happened, The truth about Greater Cave Tentacula may never come out.  
So, I did the only thing I could. I’d been avoiding it, since interacting with a Tentacula sounded super hot not conducive to scientific inquiry.  
The problem was finding one. I must have searched for a week, and probably could have searched for months and months. Despite the uptick in recent Tentacula reports, the species as a whole is still very rare, and possibly on the verge of extinction, given how few places they could hide, and how many likely spots I searched that were totally vacant. Furthermore, Tentacula are notoriously shy; you can’t just stumble on them and expect them to stay out in the open. For all I know I did come across a few in those early days, though no signs pointed to it (clean water coming from a cave without any silt or debris, clear indications of filter feeding in progress, for example).  
It was the height of summer, and eventually I set up camp in a promising location full of signs of geological activity - hot springs, namely. The water here would be mineral rich, perfect for sustaining a Tentacula. I set up my camp in the mouth of one of these caves, in the hopes that if I lingered maybe any locals would grow used to my presence. I was camping for nearly 3 days - 3 long days of surveying and sample collection, without any success.  
Then, one night, when the moon was full and the night was the hottest and stickiest it’d ever been, I stumbled upon an enormous cave not far from my camp. And on a whim, I went inside.  
……………
 
Gee, I wonder what’s going to happen next involving tentacles - Now in 4k!  
(not entirely sure if I should tag this one suggestive or questionable. Later ones are definitely gonna be explicit.)
 
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