There are better ways to get your coffee, Coco.
 
 
(rated “safe”)

@Background Pony #8A76  
I never watched scrubs, also that was hilarious

@Background Pony #8A76  
whoa

@Prometheus labs CEO  

@Prometheus labs CEO  
You have missed a Scrubs reference and thus have brought eternal shame upon yourself.

@joethehero2  
bruh

@joethehero2  
That’s a coffee cup

Either this mare has a lightbulb up her butt or her colon has a good idea.

@Background Pony #8A76  
Yes. Unless of course you’re banishing a demon.
 
… I’ve probably said too much already. Nevermind.

@Goddess Erosia  
Never shove anything up any orifice without a solid retrieval plan.

@Goddess Erosia  
You’d think something so simple would be basic common sense

I think the correct kind of scolding should read, “That’s not what coffee mugs are for”.
 
I know we’re all up for a good challenge, but please, for your own safety, be realistic. There are two huge problems with this - First, never use something so wide - the cup itself is already on the dangerously large side, the handle makes it worse. Second, NEVER use a glass or ceramic object. I don’t care how confident in the object you feel - if it’s not specifically made for that purpose (i.e smooth glass dildo), it’s not worth the risk. People have died this way. Glass jars can break, people can suffer for weeks because of the cuts, and it can get infected in a place you can’t reach to treat.
 
There are some kinds of pain so bad you would wish you could die. Don’t risk getting glass shards lodged up in there in a certain way that reaching for one could jab others in deeper.
 
I’m lucky enough to never have experienced this personally, but believe me, I’ve heard stories and I’ve seen nightmares.

Meanwhile, in the next exam room over:
 

For ur health

@Background Pony #31D6  
No, but plenty of other things left in there.

@Prometheus labs CEO  
“I’ve given everything I can  
There are no heroes left in Man”

>”Doctor, I was just trying to heat it up. I’m part kirin on my mother’s side.”  
>”Not buying it.”

@Background Pony #19E0  
I believe you. I haven’t seen such a wall, but I have several medical professionals and first responders among my friends and family, plus a shall-not-be-named large teaching hospital in my hometown. I have seen little, but heard much…

@Background Pony #19E0  
Humanity has no hope

At a hospital in a shall-remain-unspecified Southern state, there is a room used by the gastroenterology staff as a workroom. And on one wall there are many plastic bags, each containing an item that was retrieved by one of the doctors.
 
I saw things, man. I saw things.

Still, it’s an impressive accomplishment.

That… that’s not how coffee helps you poop.

@Background Pony #042D  
There is a time and a place for bedside manner, and that is not it

@Background Pony #042D  
Oh, he’s not a doctor. He just has a fetish for lab coats and wearing antiquated medical headgear.
 
You meet the most interesting ponies at fetishist conventions.

That’s terrible manners for a doctor, ya dingus.