Not mine. Saved to my notepad. Original paste has sadly been deleted.
 
Celestia gets a bellyrub
 
 
>You trudge up the path to your house, droplets of rain obscuring your vision.  
>Another day over, thank Christ.  
>You could now kick back, relax and…  
>Hang on, something’s not right.  
>You tense up as your front door swings open, as a strong gust of wind creeps past you.  
>Senses on high alert, you walk forward, slowly entering your house.  
“Hello?”  
>A creaking from upstairs answers your call, and you gulp.  
“Who’s there? Answer me!”  
>If the mystery intruder was a thief, they’d have tried to get out by now. If it was someone who wanted you dead, then they’d have attacked you already.  
>You cautiously ascend your stairs, still readying yourself for a possibly fight.  
>Another creak: you suppress your fears, and stride towards your bedroom, determined to find the source of the noise.  
>You push open the door to your bedroom, and stride inside.  
“Who the hell are-“  
>The sight before you hits you like a freight train: all your cognitive processes cease, unable to comprehend the scenario unfolding.  
>Sprawled comfortably across your bed, staring back at you with magnificent violet-tinged eyes is a majestic winged-unicorn: something so familiar, yet you were still dumbfounded.  
“You…” you finally whisper.  
>Princess Celestia giggles. “Yes, me.”  
“No. You can’t… this isn’t happening…”  
>”I think you will find it is in-fact happening.”  
“Shut up. You aren’t real, you can’t be real!” You knead your knuckles into your forehead, grimacing. “Ok. I’m going to turn around, count to ten, and when I look back, you’re going to be gone. That’s how this is going to work.”  
>Celestia claps her hooves together.  
>”Oh, is this a magic trick? I love those!” she laughs in gentle sarcasm.  
>You block out her voice, spin on your heels, and shut your eyes tightly.  
>As the seconds count down, you wonder what would have triggered this. Maybe it was a hallucination? Or were you just simply going insane?”  
>The ten seconds pass, and you turn back to your bed. Disdain fills you as Celestia remains, a smirk plastered across her face.  
>“I take it you know what I am, correct?”  
“Yeah, you’re not real, that’s what!”  
>”I do not doubt my own existence. Why not come over and prove it for yourself?”  
>You hesitate, before striding across to her and poking her head gently.  
>You recoil as your finger makes solid contact, undermining everything you know with the tiniest of touches.  
“Fuck! No! This can’t be happening! You can’t be real!”  
>”Oh calm down. It is not that great a deal you know” Celestia says, a hint of annoyance in her regal voice.  
“Not a great deal? Not a great deal! You are an imaginary talking horse, and you are on my bed! I think that’s a big-goddamn deal!”  
>”If you would sit down, preferably before you go insane and collapse, I shall explain everything.”  
>You gape at Celestia, before hesitantly sitting down at the foot of the bed.  
“Now, I can see that you’re confused by my presence. I know of the medium through which I am presented-“  
“Wait, you know you’re from a children’s TV show?”  
>”Indeed I do. Infact, I am the one who implanted my vision into the minds of the show’s creators.”  
“You… this is surreal. This is too crazy to not be a hallucination.” You let out a hollow chuckle. “So, a princess from an alternate reality implants an idea of their world into the brains behind My Little Pony, and then appears in the bedroom of a guy who watches the show. There better be a good reason for this.”  
>Celestia giggles again. “I have a reason, yes…”  
>…  
“Well, you mind sharing it?”  
>”I want my belly rubbed.”  
“Oh, that’s alr…. Wait, what?”  
>”I want my belly rubbed. By a human.”  
“I don’t even…”  
>”My belly. Your hands. Rubbing.”  
“Why on earth do you want that?”  
>”I may be a Princess, but even I indulge in some private luxuries once in a while.”  
“This is ridiculous…” You rub your eyes in frustration, before sighing.  
“Look, if I give you a belly rub, will you then go home?”  
>”I promise.”  
>You take a few seconds to think about it.  
“Fine. One belly rub, no funny business.”  
>”I wouldn’t dream of it. Besides, I checked your computer, so I know you’re not one of “those” bronies.”  
“You checked my computer?”  
>”In fairness, given the reputation of bronies, I had to make sure I wasn’t dealing with some pervert who would try and take advantage of me.”  
“You know about the fandom?”  
>”Oh yes. While I personally think it’s… intriguing, I have decided to hold off proper contact with your world for at least another 20 years.”  
“I can’t argue with you there. If a portal to equestrian was opened, you’d either end up with the entirety of Equestria getting raped or millions of slaughtered neckbeards.”  
>Celestia nods, before stretching out, belly exposed. “I agree. But enough talk: begin the rubbing, would you please.”  
“I’m still convinced that this is a dream, hoax, or some symptom of a mental illness, but I’ll be damned if I give up the opportunity to rub a princess-pony’s belly.  
>”That’s the spirit!” Celestia chuckles, and you position yourself beside her.  
“Ok, so…”  
>”Just rub it gently. That’s all you need to do.”  
>With a slight hesitation, you place your hand on her white, expansive belly.  
>”Yes, that’s it.” Celestia encourages.  
>Your hand trails along her belly, and you make sure to keep away from her… “private” regions.  
>Celestia hums happily as your stroke her, hand moving up and down her chest.  
>It’s just like stroking a dog, if said dog was a magical sentient horse princess from another dimension with a warped sense of humour.  
>Celestia continues to coo, hum and whistle as you rub her down as non-sexually as you can.  
>”Scratch my ears.” She says, breaking the silence.  
“Huh?”  
>”My ears. Scratching.”  
>You stop and stare at her, before rolling your eyes.  
“You better leave after all this is done.”  
>Celestia smiles as your shimmy up, leaving a hand on her belly. You gently place a finger at the nape of her ear, before digging it in.  
>”Oh how heavenly… I wish I had fingers…”  
>You continue scratching Celestia’s ear: you have to refrain from d’awing as it begins to twitch.  
>Meanwhile, Celestia’s face seems to be etched in bliss: a dreamy smile accompanying glazed over eyes.  
>The hour creeps on slowly, time marked only by the gradual aching in your arms as you stroke backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards…  
>Celestia suddenly stretches out, before kneeling upright on the bed.  
“You done? Ready to go home?”  
>”Verily. I must say, you did an excellent job.”  
“I feel defiled…”  
>”I’m sure you enjoyed it. Maybe I’ll be seeing more of you in the future, if my cravings demand satiation…”  
“Next time, don’t bust down the door to get in.”  
>”Very well. Oh, and be sure not to tell anyone of our little secret.”  
“You think anyone would believe me?”  
>The two of you share a laugh.  
>”No, I suppose they would not. See you around…”  
>With a flash, Celestia disappears, and you sit absent-mindedly feel the warmth of where she lay.  
>You sure as hell didn’t expect to return home to this…  
>And why the hell did she choose you out of all the people in the world?  
>As you ponder these questions, a smile forms on your face.  
>By leaving you with these answered questions, Celestia had guaranteed that you’d be happy to see her next time.  
>The sly bitch…

@Ihhh  
Of course. Nature doesn’t care, man.

@Nightweaver20xx  
All mammals accept monotremes do.

@observer  
I’m on it…

awww~ Tia wants some affection

@Prof  
Thanks. Compliments are always appreciated.

@Nightweaver20xx  
Good try, duck.

@Prof  
Remember kids, if it doesn’t fit, always force it.

@Prof  
+1

Suggestive? Rlly? You dirty perverts try to force it even here? This is sad.

fine, one more tummy rub.

This would be quite a good publicity campaingn to turn Lunar Republicans into Canterlot Monarchists…
 
[Beat]
 

A-d’awww-able

Cutie needs a belly rub?

@SilFoe  
I choose to believe Bill Cosby was both the father and mother of Princesses Celestia and Luna. That may upset some people.

@Nightweaver20xx  
That’s getting into headcanon territory, so whatever you choose to believe makes all the difference and no one is right or wrong.
 
The only canon I have to go off of is the diary thing that implied there’s a whole alicorn culture and probably normal ways of producing new alicorns. But that’s just one little book thing.
 
We also don’t see Rainbow Dash’s, Spike’s or Fluttershy’s mothers, but we presume they have them.
 
 
@Celestia’s Servant  
Because, so long as it remains non-serious, debating ponies is fun?

@Nightweaver20xx  
Why discuss something that just makes this image cuter? Not everything needs a logical explanation…

@SilFoe  
Okay, well think about this for a second. Would Celestia have a belly button? I mean, who was her mother? LET’S DO THIS SON.

@Nightweaver20xx  
Anything that was attached to it’s mother with an umbilical cord has a belly button… most mammals just don’t have as prominent of one as humans do.

@Nightweaver20xx  
Of course they do, why wouldn’t they?

Wait… do horses even have belly buttons?

I wanna sleep on it.

I want to rub the royal belly.