Silent_Witness
Chippin’ In
Started a new story. Managed to knock out around 14,000 words in just five days. Gave me the motivation to finish the chapter of the FE story I was working on. Wish things could be like that all the time.
“Uh, yeah, sure.” I replied. What was I supposed to give him back? He already had Wondertale, Tales of Gallopvin, Hoof-Life: Scarce, Bark: Survival Involved, Super Mareio Oddysee, Planet Toaster, Has-Been Zeroes, Blockbuild, Salt Lick City, Bonestorm II, Ashes of Equestria: The Remains, Stable II, Odie Sphere, Croctodad, Sturgeon Simulator, Earthworm Djinn, The Cynic Hedgehog: Rise of Limerick, and Atelier Apple Bloom. The only things he didn’t have that I did were Murky No. 7, which sucked, Toucan-Lamey, which was even worse, and Hoshi’s New Island, which he’d already expressed a hatred of.
“Condolences for,
the death of your big brother,
may he rest in peace.”
“What is my name?”“Greg.”“What is my father’s name?”“Mort.”“Who is my father’s most hated fictional character?”“Some pink ghost filly, I forget her name.”“Berenstein or Berenstain?”“Bloodstain.”“How many fingers am I holding up?”“What are fingers?”“What has four cannons and four coffins but only one rider?”“I don’t know”“What is creature number 750?”“A dirt horse.”“Who voices Captain Andromeda on the hit TV series of the same name?”“Sequoia Paige Sempervirens.”“Two trains leave the same station on the same track heading in opposite directions. One train is carrying 15 metric tonnes of charcoal, the other 1 ton of undelivered mail. The charcoal train is moving at 88 miles per hour, while the mail train is moving at the speed of light. Both trains have to make a detour onto the Puffing Millie in Horstralia exactly halfway through their journey. Which one will arrive at the snaking canyons of Leethir first, and how long will it take?”“The one carrying the Queen of Angle Land, and it will take 45 days, 9 hours, and 17 minutes.”“You’re hopeless, little filly! I can’t let you go on like this!”
Uwuwu was a small edge-of-the-forest town of about a thousand or so people. In other words, about the size of Ponyville. It was a three-way junction along trade routes,The town boasted Tudor style architecture, but the Main Street pointed to all sorts of anachronisms. A sacrificial altar, a cybernetics workshop, an inn, a video rental store, an Apple store, a McDonald’s, a 1950’s style bowling alley, an alchemy workshop, a 19th century smithy, a wild western saloon, a Toad House, and the entrance to a fallout-proof vault embedded in a cliff face all lined the north side from east to west, in that order.Inside the medieval-looking inn was an art deco lobby straight out of the 1900’s. Despite this, the desks featured holographic screens manned by androids. A virtual hookah sat in the corner, and beyond it was a 1980’s video game arcade. A Nintendo Wii and plasma TV were mounted on the opposite wall, the set displaying a game of Mario Tennis being played by two fillies in spacesuits and a rugged looking unicorn colt. Pictures of Moaning Lisa and a sand crawler resembling the one just outside the town decorated the lobby walls. Two old-style elevator doors opened revealing a plain unicorn mare with a PDA cutie mark standing in an elevator straight from the distant future.What kind of place was this? Everything looked so random. For one, the short brunette unicorn was repairing the elevator with stone tools and a magic wand, while a Beatles song played on the PA. That just struck Apple Bloom as weird.
Here, in the depths of the Inverted Continent of Inverstria, reality wasn’t so much on an occasional lunch break as it was lying in bed reading Fallout: Equestria 24/7. Which is more or less what the 69 local versions of Discord were doing at this time. Of course, time was meaningless here, while it was technically 13:13 FM on Smarch ꘧꘧ 101 D.M., the day of the Battle of the Hamstrings, it was also (The date this chapter gets published) Aus East, the day of Link’s Awakening to the Breath of the Wild, and the Big Bang all at the same time.A large bellow and backmasked Wurmple cry signalled someone at the door. Discord #46 flicked his wrist, turning on the shower. The door flew off its hinges and landed smack on the stairs to nowhere.
“Besides,” Hugo continued, “Don’t you mares have kids to get home to?”“Ah shit,” The purple mare screamed, “She’s not gonna be a happy Puppy…”“Mah boi’s gonna be cryin’, Ah know it!” A tall yellow mare groaned.“Wait for us, Apple Bloom!” Two other mares, a white unicorn and orange pegasus, followed behind her.
“Long ago, the clans of Hakuneigh and Mooriya fought for power over Gensocute. They weren’t the only clans to do so, there was also Maregatroid, Horseyguma, Toyosatomimiga, and my own clan, Kirinsame.”
“You know what, Sassy? I think you might be too big for the elevator.”Sassy had never been so humiliated in her entire life. Here she was, sitting in a device specifically designed to transport large numbers of ponies, and it was having trouble with just two. She found it personally insulting to be discriminated against in this fashion.All of a sudden, the elevator car began to move. It was clearly straining, though whether the high-pitched squeaking was due to age or the machinery struggling with the oversized mare’s immense mass they couldn’t tell.After what felt like a whole hour (and probably was), the elevator finally reached floor 49. As the doors opened, an orange earth pony stallion appeared before them. Something was off about him, though. Large chunks of his skin were missing, and his charred mane seemed to be fused to his ears by magic. No doubt about it, he was a ghoul, that much was clear and obvious.
“For want of a breakfast, the contortionist was lost.
For want of the contortionist, the attention was lost.
For want of the attention, the confidence was lost.
For want of the confidence, the Watcher was lost.
For want of the Watcher, the invitation was lost.
For want of the invitation, the deception was lost.
For want of the deception, the princess was lost.
For want of the princess, the Empire was lost.
For want of the Empire, the book was lost.
For want of the book, the alicorn was lost.
For want of the alicorn, the duty was lost.
For want of the duty, the envy was lost.
For want of the envy, the compassion was lost.
For want of the compassion, the truth was lost.
For want of the truth, the talents were lost.
For want of the talents, the retcon was lost.
For want of the retcon, the company was lost.
For want of the company, the school was lost.
For want of the school, the zebras were lost.
For want of the zebras, the ruler was lost.
For want of the ruler, the peace was lost.
For want of the peace, Equestria was lost.
And all for the want of breakfast.”
With that, Babs teleported. Wait, what? Yes, the earth pony mare teleported.
New perk added: Claustrophilia - Tight spaces aren’t so scary anymore, in fact, you’re starting to love them! You can fit through a regular sized door almost like normal now!
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