Applejack, so finally we meet you  
This is an occasion, let’s toast it,  
Up yours, Relax, Canape? Cigarette?  
Let’s talk turkey, Sign here and we’ll book you on lecturing tours.  
Yes darling, We’re sending Photographers Thursday  
So get the plant ready and wear a clean shirt.  
Need a pen?  
Aren’t you thrilled? It’s the cover of Life Magazine!  
Dessert?  
I’m telling you son, it’s a cinch to get ratings.  
The title is Marvin’s,  
The concept is mine,  
The first weekly show on a network  
And you’re gonna host it, you lucky kid, Sign