The Downfall of Bhaalspawn (contains possible SJW discussions)

Throughout most of my school life I stubbornly resisted the very concept of homework. I wouldn’t do my homework, I wouldn’t even take it home, I’d tell my parents I had no homework (which my father would rant and rave about how we should be having 3 hours of homework a day) and I would get into arguments with my teachers about it when they confronted me.

My main sticking point was that when school hours end, I am on my own time. And it is completely ridiculous for the school to expect me to budget my own time for more schoolwork when I’ve already been there for nine hours. If the nine hour schoolday wasn’t enough to make the lesson stick, then that is their failing and not my own.

Now because schools design their curriculum on the idea of several hours worth of homework and fuck personal time (training kids to be complacent with overworking for no compensation I see) this negatively impacted my grades. But I managed to stay above the minimum 50 in every class to pass, so I took it as no major loss and persisted because “Slightly less impressive grades that don’t matter anyway” was a fair trade for setting boundaries against the school board’s attempts to control all my time.

By 12th Grade I was in full “Not giving a fuck” mode and would actively curse out teachers who still bothered me about it.

“Lily, you still don’t have your homework.”
“Fuck off and bother someone else.”

Yes I did get suspended a lot. Yes it was worth it.

I got shit for this from my parents as well, but my parents were notorious for pitching a shit fit regardless of whether I behaved myself or not. They would always find something to start a fight about, so knowing in advance what they were most likely to rage about was advantageous because I could prepare what I was going to yell back in advance and also spread Legos just behind the door when my father barged in.

I’m a firm believer in the fact that if you just let your teachers and your parents walk all over you, they will. They generally have no regard for your personal time or your personal desires, it’s up to you to set those boundaries and have the fortitude to stand your ground when challenged.

So I’m having issues of constant Internet and Phone outages and other people seem to be having the same issues in the past, but the solution was always “leave and switch to Bell.”

This makes me suspect that Bell is the one sabotaging people’s internet. The fact that they so aggressively send people to your door and fill your mailbox with letters is suspicious.

Some Rando - “Hey! Five years ago you said something racist/homophobic/transphobic!”

Me - “Yeah, I’m really sorry about that…”

Real talk, me being able to be considered “woke” is still a relatively new thing. As in, within the last few years. And even then I still fall face-first into a ditch full of used surgical equipment from time to time.

It’s not uncommon for people to find really old blog posts that are still lingering around or REALLY old videos and be confused as to how much of a (charitably speaking) fucking tool I was as recently as five years ago. I’ve talked in the past about how my very slowly broadening knowledge about trans people from being 17 and a complete asshole about it to… well now. But that applies to Racism, Sexism, and Homophobia as well.

When I say I was a fucking tool, I really mean a FUCKING TOOL. And we’re not talking some esoteric “Lily’s antisemetic because she criticized a cartoonist for their portrayal of fascism” horseshit. We’re talking “Homophobes have free speech” level being a fucking tool.

Early career Lily would have been all about ethics in games journalism, is what I’m saying.

It’s still a point of embarrassment for me, embarrassment that is magnified a hundredfold on the occasion I do something stupid and ignorant in the present (Cough-that one ask two months ago-Cough) but if you’re someone who’s found some of these old and bad takes from me, believe me when I say that over the years I have put a lot of effort toward being better and while perfection may not be attainable that’s not going to stop me getting as close as I damn well can.

Me: "If a person says they're trans, that's all you need." 

Some Idiot In The Comments: "Um, actually, if you want to get hormones and surgery you need a professional diagnosis of gender dysphoria!" 

Me: "That rule is only in place to make it harder for people to transition. In more enlightened parts of the world you don't have to prove shit to get these things unless you're applying for government assistance with the costs."

Knob - “Why do you keep saying ‘Q-Slur’? You’re in an educational context, so it’s okay to use it!”

Me - “I DON’T FUCKING WANT TO!”